All the next day Petunia went around doing dastardly deeds.
She filled Pirate Pete's boots with eels and put a dead fish in his bed.
She put tacks in his biscuits and cut holes in his pants.
She painted the whole front of his ship pink while it was at anchor near the Palmetto Bay Marina.
As for Pirate Bill, he got even more tricks played on him. She glued his pockets closed, hid his skull and cross bones flag, cut a hole in the bottom of his lifeboat, and put a shark in his bunk.
She was a whirlwind of dirty tricks.
Well Pirate Pete and Pirate Bill had thought this was just what would happen. They knew they were no match for her. Their plan had a different kind of twist. They put it into action the minute Petunia burst into the Jarvis Creek Tavern to brag about all of her mean tricks and claim she had won the contest.
Pirate Bill secretly put his finger into the catsup on his tray of french fries and rubbed it on his head.
"Oh, oh, oh, my head. I have gashed my head and I am going to bleed to death. Oh, somebody help me. Ouch, my head is killing me. It is going to fall off, I just know it," he cried with big pretend tears running down his face.
"You don't look hurt to me. What a big baby you are," said Petunia in a cold voice.
"No, he is really badly hurt and he may die. I have a rag to tie around his head but I am afraid of the sight of blood," said Pirate Pete in a `snivel and whine' kind of way.
""Here, give it to me you coward. You two are just a couple of crybabies, aren't you? I will put it on his head. You are too stupid and he is too scared," Petunia said in her rudest voice. And so saying, she tied the rag around Pirate Bill's head and turned away in disgust.
Just at that moment, Pirate Chief Dave stepped into the tavern and declared the contest to be over.
"I win, I win, I win," shouted Petunia with glee. "You two haven't even played one dirty trick on me. I have been playing dirty tricks on you non-stop, all day, all over Hilton Head Island."
"That is true, Petunia, but you still lose," declared Dave the Pirate Chief. "You did a good deed, so you are out of the contest."
"I never did!" she cried.
"Oh, yes you did. You put a rag on my head and saved my life just now. And it felt so good when you did it, that it made me smile right down to the bottom of my big, black pirate boots, too!" said Pirate Bill.
"But I didn't mean that to be a good deed - I just wanted you to be quiet and stop being such a baby. I never meant ... Oh, well. You are right, I guess that was a good deed." She looked down at her shoes, grinned and said, "You are right about something else, Pirate Bill. It felt pretty nice to be kind. I might even try it again some day."
"Let me know any time you are in a good deed mood, Petunia," said Pirate Bill. "I will help you. That's what friends are for. And by the way, where did you ever get such a pretty name?"
Oh, I see a lovely friendship in Petunia's future, don't you boys and girls? I love a story with a happy ending. I think she will be nicer and nicer every day, especially to Pirate Bill. What do you think?